The Roof is Leaking

I began to understand

when the house started to crumble.

Little by little, cracks in the ceiling spread

like arms of lightning

with the falling dust serving 

as the storm’s raindrops.

The playing cards’ edges began to curl.

The hands that held them began to shake.


They were growing old.


It’s not something that you grasp

when sipping in the summer sun at age eight,

when everything seems eternal,

but I began to understand.

The wave that knocked me down

was followed by a similar pattern of water,

engulfing me in the same salty wholeness

that the water two years prior held.


They were growing old.


I could not begin to fathom the idea

of one day never again journeying to see them

to hold them

to tell them I’m thankful

that they were there to tuck me in

and make me milkshakes well into my teens.

I started thinking of what was beyond

the tiny world in which they lived

the one outside the life we all took pictures of

and made memories within.    

Pool, trampoline, horses.

Playhouse for the youngest. 

I desperately clung to the hope that they’d

witness the moments of my life I needed them to. 

I desperately hoped that whatever took them

was gracious in doing so.

What would be waiting for them?

A light, maybe. Surely not fire. 

My fantasies of their eyes reconnecting to mine

after years spent stuck in a great divide

clouded my every thought.

I thought of being able to tell them

everything they had missed.

I thought of scanning the white room

and spotting them from afar.

I thought of their voices,

tinted with the humor and giddiness

of friends long since parted being reunited. 

Wrinkled hands outstretched to me, saying,

“Come, sit a while.

Come, talk a while.

We’ve been expecting you.”